By Richard Lee - 05/06/2008

What If?

After watching the Champions League final I couldn't help but think ‘what if?’.

What if events of that game been different? What would have resulted? What if John Terry had decided to smash the ball down the middle of the goal and scored the winning penalty or decided against taking it and his replacement converted from 12 yards. Would Ronaldo have been remembered for this season as the ‘nearly man’, 41 goals but missed the crucial spot-kick in the shootout which cost United as it almost did against Barcelona? Would Avram Grant have been offered a new three-year contract at Chelsea for the fine job he’d done in leading his team to a Carling Cup final, second in the league and champions of Europe despite a poor start to the season?

We all have moments in our life that are memorable for certain reasons and possibly shape our lives. A big one, on a personal note, was to change my mind after deciding as a 14-year-old to quit football. Where would I be now? What direction would my life have taken? Would I have regretted my decision for years to come or would I now be in a more privileged position and writing about how quitting football was the best decision of my life? I’ll never know.

The point I’m getting to is that seemingly small events in your life can have a huge impact over time - small decisions can have big consequences and it is generally the results of these actions that can have an effect on future actions.

For instance someone who is down on their luck can often blame the world and everyone around them for the position they are in, whereas someone who seems to have had all the luck looks at life through a completely different perspective. I’ve attended a few psychology seminars in my time and the idea of raising your standards is a regular issue. There is the idea that a small positive change over time can have a huge impact on your life. There is also a belief that you create your own luck but if this belief were true would that mean that John Terry deserved to slip on the crucial penalty? Was this ‘karma’ paying him back for something else we don't know about?

I believe not, although in principal I do like the idea that you create your own luck and I’ll tell you why. That idea is an empowering idea; it means you will push yourself in the knowledge that by doing so, good things will come your way. Usually that with this extra effort and improvement, that normally tends to be the case.

I am also a strong believer that thing happen for a reason, therefore I believe ‘what if?’ to be a dangerous thought! My choice to believe this allows me to let things rest.

As a child I found this tough and the idea of what could have been would eat away at me but I came to the realisation that sometimes you can’t affect these things. You can give everything you have, your heart and soul but still not get the desired outcome, surely if you’ve done this there can be no regrets? This doesn’t apply to just football either; it can help in all areas of life.

Would much have changed had John Terry scored that penalty? Maybe, that we don’t really know but as for John Terry as a player he’ll still go down as a Chelsea legend and rightly so. He’ll bounce back, as he already has for England and he’ll continue to play at the highest level for years to come. The biggest credit to him is that he was willing to put himself on the line.

That takes a big man and a strong character. He could've got down on himself and taken the route of blaming others for his misfortune but I couldn’t have seen him doing that.

Similar to David Beckham after the World Cup dismissal many years ago. I believe Terry is of the mindset that he’ll come back stronger and take whatever positives he can from this experience and, for that reason, in time he’ll be idolised more than ever.

My admiration for him was summed up in the decision to step up to take that penalty; the fact he missed is insignificant in my eyes.